About Marriage

Saw this article and would like to share it to everyone:


During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said,"How do I know if I married the right person?" I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, "It depends. Is that your husband?" In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?"

Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind. Here's the answer. EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love... because it's happening TO YOU. People in love sometimes say, "I was swept off my feet." Think about the imagery of that _expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.

Falling is love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute,drive you nuts. Notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage. At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry the right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else.

This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, church, a hobby, afriendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this): The Key To Succeeding In Marriage Is Not Finding The Right Person; It's Learning To Love The Person You Found!

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make" it day in and day out. That's why we have the ___expression "the labor oflove." Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly,it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work. Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage. Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable...you can "make" love.Love in marriage is indeed a "decision"... not just a feeling.

-author unknown

Digital Scrapbooking - First few pages!!

La lang... i'm bored! Hahahaha!


Sukob and and the after effect...

Vergil and i were supposed to be watching "Pirates of the Carribean 2" last night. But then i heard from friends that "Sukob" was ok daw. Actually, when i saw the trailer when i was watching ASAP last sunday, i was curious with the story already. So when i heard it's already in the theaters, i sweet talk my husband (again! the first one was the moments of love movie) into seeing sukob instead of pirates. Syempre, di nakahindi sa charms ko ang aking hubby so he agreed to see the movie. Although he warned me na baka sobrang takot na naman ako after just like when we watched Feng Shui few years back. Hahahaha! I still remember that night... i was so scared and pati sya nahawa sa takot ko! Hehehe! Anyways, so yun, final na that we're going to watched Sukob. Vergil was supposed to get tickets for the 7:50 time but i got caught in a super long traffic along nichols skyway so we decided to just get the 9:00 pm time. I went out of the office at exactly 6pm and arrived at festival mall alabang mga around 8:15 na! Friday kasi... traffic...Haaayyyy! So we ate dinner muna pagdating ko sa mall.
After getting ourselves settled inside the theater, we were teasing each other like "hala, baka di tayo makatulog nito!" Hahaaaha! We noticed that there were many who went to see the movie, so sabi namin, mas ok, para di masyadong nakakatakot! Hahahaha! Talking about two cowards!!!

The movie started.....

Hell! Ilang beses akong nagulat! I was holding my husband's arm the whole time and i was cursing the movie! Vergil was laughing coz sigaw ako ng sigaw. And i was even covering my eyes na whenever the music changes na into the there-she-is (the multo) tune...

In short, i got really scared! And so is my husband! He even told me, "last na to ha? Yoko na ganyang movie. Kahit magmakaawa ka, di na kita pagbibigyan!" Hahaahaha!

The aftermath of the movie???? Here it is:

Vergil parked at the lower ground level of the mall and there were few cars left already when we got there. I didn't want to scare him so di ko pinahalata that i was so atat na to get into the car and get out of the parking lot. Tapos when we got inside na, Vergil was looking at the backseat. Sabi ko, "why tingin ka ng tingin sa likod?" Sagot sa akin, "Heh! Wag kang magsimula...." Hahaahhaa! He was scared too! Sa movie kasi, daming scenes where the multo biglang nag aapear sa likod ng car! Hahahaa!

Well, the final after math? WE SLEPT WITH THE LIGHTS ON!!!!


PS. Movie info: http://www.sukobthemovie.com/about.html


On traffic and being late

I usually go out of the house between 7 to 7:30 am for me to be able to arrive at my office at around 8:45 ( office hours is from 9am to 6pm). But lately, i was swiping my id card between 9 to 930am! Meaning... I'M LATE! Waahhh! What will happen now on my punctuality points????!!!

I go out of the house same time everyday... arrive at my bus stop same time... but once i take the jeepney going to "Mandaluyong loob" (famous because of the mental hospital), there starts my ranting and asking of the same question everyday now - ba't naman kasi ngayon lang ginagawa and drainage and daan when it's already tag-ulan and pasukan???!!!" Haaaayyy!!! Ewan ko ba, all summer there were never any road fixing activities along the area. Kung kelan naman pasukan na and tag ulan, tsaka naman binungkal at inayos and boni avenue! Helllooo! Di ka kaya mainis to be stucked in a super duper long traffic???

La lang, labas lang me ng inis ko sa MMDA at sa gobyerno for the great timing... I wonder tuloy... di ba talaga nila naisip na mas ok ata pag summer ang mga projects na ganyan. Heheehehe!

So, dapat tomorrow, 6:30 alis na ko ng house...

Aga kaya nun... i wonder if my husband will want to to drive me sa bus terminal that early...

Kasi naman....!!!!!


Feeling better!

I'm so grateful to have been awaken from this bad dream before i hurt all people who cares for me. Yesterday was one of the happiest days of my life. Being able to pour it all out to my husband and being able to be secured by his words, hugs and kisses! God! I am so lucky to have Vergil! And i realized, why am i making things so diificult for me and for us? I maybe deprived of attention and love when i was a child, but then He gave me Vergil now. And i was so dumb to have taken that for granted!

I almost pulled myself away from Vergil... but i'm grateful he never let go of the grip. He gave me space and time and waited for me to cry out everything to him, which i mistakenly took that he never cared.

I love my husband so much... He's everything i ever dreamed of.

Now i'm smiling again... I know there will still be times when i will feel down. But knowing that Vergil is there... i can get through it.




The rain has added more to the sadness i'm feeling inside. Lucky for the students coz classes are suspended (again!) today. I was wishing i can also just lazily stay in bed... think...cry... and sleep. But well, i can't do anything but ride the bus to my work and look at the same sight i've been looking for two years now. On my way, i decided to drop by Mightee Mart to buy coffee and cocoa drinks to ease the cold when i get to office. While waiting for my turn in the counter, chocolate bars caught my eyes. No cravings on my part whatsoever since i'm not really a chocolate lover... i was never inlove with sweets. But i remember this one article about chocolates that they're anti-depressant. So i grab one bar of kitkat and hersheys thinking "why don't i try if it's true!" Haha! Wasn't that a very desperate move to make myself feel better??
After making my cup of hot cocoa and getting settled in my office chair, i ate my hersheys bar. Minutes have passed and i felt nothing. Nada! Still the same old feeling of helplessness, hurt and sadness.

Hahaahaa! Talking about being so dumb to believe that a bar of chocolate would ease everything!!!



Disregard my RENEWED Etc blog. Coz i'm back to being so down... and if i may add HURT. I really thought i found the person who can understand me... the person who can be sensitive enough to know what's bothering me... what can make me feel ok... the person who can help me with the insecurities hard life installed in my being. Well i was wrong. And i guess it's my fault to expect too much from someone...
But im still positive that one day... my renewed blog will once again be posted here but with a better light. I realized, no one can help myself but me... no one can understand all the things i went through but myself. So, i have to help myself... not expect anyone to help me. I think i can do this on my own. My parents once abandoned me emotionally but i survived. I think this one should be much easier... i was a child then. Now i'm more mature and abled to get through all this...
I'm going to visit HIM later. Just like the old times. Pour myself out... cry... and ask for help... HE would never let me down i know.
Oh, i think i was wrong in telling that no one can ever understand me. There's still HIM.


Renewed etc

After how many days of feeling so down and depressed... i'm back! I still feel sad at times but i guess whatever problems i have... i know i can pass through it... one at a time... with Vergil by my side. It had helped me a lot to cry without saying a word to Vergil. And his hugs and kisses made me feel that everything will be alright. I really admire my husband for being so patient with me. I know it was so hard for him to be seeing me so down... and for being unaware of what to make me feel better coz i was not giving him answers whenever he asks me what's wrong. I have to admit during that time, i have this "tampo" with him. Call it selfish but i felt bad when he attended their company's overnight outing (9th anniversary) in Batangas. That time kasi i was so down na and stressed out that i really needed a break. Tapos there he was, enjoying the scene and vacation. Parang it felt unfair.... selfish ko ba??? Damn! I knew it was a company outing... but still i felt so bad.
Well, when he got back, i was hoping for him to offer me naman a weekend getaway coz i was really on the verge of snapping na because of work stress and other problems but i think i forgot how insensitive guys are... much more that Vergil's a Gemini who's personality includes "insensitive." So, after how many days of having my tampo with him, i finally asked him for us to take a weekend vacation. He said ok. We'll scheduled it pa nga lang... we'll consider muna our budget and time. So i still don't know when. (Sigh!) But hey, i'll just look on the brighter side: at least now i have something to look forward to!



It's monday again....

It was kinda hard to get up kanina... i still feel so tired and worn out. My two day weekend vacation was no help at all. I needed to think but i'm bothered with so many thoughts and problems that i ended up just ignoring my much needed time to meditate and sort everything out.

I don't know... Vergil was asking me last night what's bothering me but i can't tell him what it is coz even myself couldn't understand what's wrong with me...

Stress is getting on with me and i think i'm going to burn out...

I just wish i could go someplace peaceful and quiet where i can think and pull myself together...


Wish List

1. Baguio vacation

2. Nurture Spa trip and overnight

3. A one day shopping trip at Divisoria and Dapitan arcade

4. A new sofa

5. A new bed mattress

6. Our first baby

I'm so stressed.... i really need a vacation...

Hmmmnnn? How about a visit to Laoag? Need to get my nerves back...

The Cellphone Kwento

It's friday and it's nearly 5pm. I can feel my body batteries already draining down... but i still have to wait for 6pm before i can get out of the office. (Sigh!)
Anyways, two days ago, got a call from my husband asking me i already wanted to buy my new phone. Oh don't get me wrong... i'm not changing into a new and up to date mobile phones coz i can't afford them (wink*)... I saw kasi this two new affordable phones from motorola. I liked them instantly coz they're slim and small. Hehehe! I like phones that fits to my jeans pocket! The first one cost only 4k - small, slim and has an fm radio; the other one around 6k - it has a camera, slim, no fm radio though. Going back to Vergil's phone call, I immeadiately said yes... hell, i was excited! Hahahaa! We went to memo express since the phone i was planning to get was offered in zero interest installment! Hahahaha! So cheap na nga ikecredit card pa namin! Di kasi kasama sa budget eh... i think Vergil just wanted to cheer me up coz i was so down the past days. Ok, going back, when we got there we tried to check muna the other phones. And i noticed Vergil looking so intently at Sony Ericsson's walkman phone. I knew right there and then that he wants it. Well, Vergil lost two phones already that's why the last phone we bought was cheap na lang para pag nawala, di masakit sa bulsa. But knowing him who is a gadget lover, he wants to get rid of his old phone na. So i asked him, "do you want that phone?" He said yes and told me it's quite pricey. I checked the price and he's telling the truth.. Three walkman phones where displayed, only one i knew we can afford so i asked him if he likes that particular phone. He was a bit hesistant coz he liked the others more. But when we asked the features he said ok naman pala. Then i insisted that we buy that na lang, tapos hiraman kame. Ang lolo! Biglang nagglow ang face pero syempre ayaw pahalata.... to make it short... we bought the phone.

And while we were walking to the parking lot, i was teasing him, "this is my phone ha?" He was laughing. When we got home, i told him to just give me his phone, then he can have the new phone. Naku! He was saying NO pa... pakipot. I told him its ok kasi i'm scared na ganun phone ko kasi baka mawala. Coz i lost two phones na rin... actually they were stolen. Hay! After mga kunwaring pakipot, tuwang tuwa ang bata! Hahahaha!
Well, i ended up not having the new phone but still i was happy... seeing my husband so happy makes me happy na din.



Have you ever encountered times when you felt so alone and helpless? When it seems the world turned its back on you and you wonder if there's still anyone out there who cares for what you feel, more so, understands what you're goin through?

Well, that TIME is now for me...

The sad part? I think no one understands... or even try to.

The worst thing is i really don't know why i'm feeling this way...


I Wish....

I just wish i can be more secure and confident that life is fair.... i always have this worry that if i am happy now, tomorrow or the next days to come will surely not. I don't know... maybe because life wasn't that fair to me... or i just thought so.

I never really had a normal childhood. I was forced to become mature on my early age just so i can protect myself from life's adversities. You see, being part of a broken family wasn't easy... but i had to show the world that i am not affected... that it was ok. And i made myself believe that i was strong coz despite my parent's separation... despite the unending pointing of fingers of who's fault the marriage failed... i never made it a reason of ruining my life. There are times when i envy my friends whenever i saw them with their family so happy and complete. And those times, i always convinced myself that i am happy too the despite the family situation, i know both my parents love me and it's all that matters. And i knew it was a lie... i was never happy.... i was wishing they're together.. and we're complete.

I grew up still wishing for that until one day i stopped.

And it gave birth to my insecurities....

I had past relationships before Vergil... two serious relationships... the last one left me. I don't know... one of his reasons why he left me is that i always reject his marriage proposals and it made him question if he's not deserving of me... and other selfish reasons.

Yes, i was scared to lifetime commitment. I was scared that he will leave me too. Almost everyone i love do that. When my parents separated, it felt that way. They may be there physically but they were never really there for me. I grew up in house... not a home.

Then Vergil came... and it felt home. But i was still scared... more scared coz i can't bear the thought of losing him. I love him so much that i married him.

And now im wishing again.... that i can stop worrying and just trust him of his promises. I'm still scared that i can't have the good things i have now forever.

And now i wish.... that i just could trust that life is fair.


Top Ten

Earlier in our relationship, i always ask Vergil to give me ten reasons why he loves me... and his answers, oftentimes, are combinations of flattering, irritating and sometimes "bola" statements. But still, i really love hearing those reasons (sorry have no plans of posting those here. *wink). Then he would ask me back the same question but i always answer him "basta" or give him answers but i would never come up to ten reasons... it's always less than 5 or so. Tapos he will ask me, "yun lng?" And i'll just nod and smile... then hug him and tell him... "i cannot enumerate reasons why i love you... basta i love you for what you are... good or bad." That's it... PERIOD!
But now, i want to give my husband top ten reasons why i love and married him. Here it goes luv, save your biggest smile for these words:

3. HE'S MAALAGA AND SWEET (konting improvement pa sa pagiging thoughtful, hehe)
5. HE ALWAYS MAKES ME FEEL GOOD ABOUT MYSELF (he thinks i'm pretty and smart!)
6. A GOOD KISSER (mwah!)
8. TALL, DARK AND HANDSOME (yehey! super smile na hubby ko!)

I still have a lot of reasons and it keeps on piling up everyday. Well, what can i say? I MARRIED THE RIGHT PERSON AND I FEEL SO LUCKY!


This Never Happened Before Song

When i saw the trailer of Moments of Love movie, my curiousity of what happened to the two lovers (Dingdong Dantes and Ysa Calzado) who's time difference goes about 40 years, has prompt me to see the movie. We should be watching Ice Age that night but i sweet talk my husband into getting tickets of Moments of Love ( pumayag sya kasi curious din sya!) *wink
The movie was ok. Not the usual tagalog movie... i mean, i wasn't bored... i was touched. Simple yung story pero maganda! Anyways, few days after that, my brother told us he saw a trailer of a keanu reeves and sandra bullock movie (The Lakehouse) na parang moments of love daw. Ganda daw ng trailer. So vergil and i decided to see that movie.
We watched the movie on its opening day...
Well, i like the story of this movie than that of Moments of Love. Kasi time difference nung main characters is only two years which made it possible na sila ang magkakatuluyan! Hehehhe! Talking about being a romantic. And ang ganda how they saw each other in the end. Yun nga lang, medyo boring sa umpisa. Si hubby nga antok na antok na. Nagising lang sya nung huling part. Hahaha! But one scene caught my attention: yung part na sumasayaw si keanu and si sandra bullock. They really looked good together! And they had the perfect background song!!!! I don't know, but i fell in love with the song instantly. My assistant, Joy saw the movie din and noticed also the song... and the search for that song started. Search agad kami sa net and was so lucky coz Joy was able to download it. Here it is: THIS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE BY PAUL MAcCARTNEY.
I immeadiately downloaded it on my MP3 player and di ako nagsasawa listening to it. I even burned a cd containing that song para pag nasa kotse ako ni vergil, me ipeplay ako. Hahahaha! To the point na nga na nakikiusap si vergil na ibang song naman!
The song is already playing in our wedding website. U can check it out: